Communication
Let’s face it… EVERY relationship (even the best of them) will face hardships and have disagreements. The role of communication in any relationship cannot be overemphasized. Men and women communicate differently, and we are not often taught how the opposite sex communicates with us, nor are we taught how to better communicate with them. Hence the saying, men are from Mars and women are from Venus. In relationships we often focus on the route of the problem themselves and not on handling problems. All relationships are established and developed by means of communication. The greatest deterrent to a relationship is silence and anger. Silence will do the same amount of damage to a relationship below the surface as degrading words would do above the surface!
“IF YOU EVER WANT SOMETHING TO DIE, STOP TALKING TO IT!” – T.D. Jakes
It is important to communicate and discuss problems in a timely manner so they don’t build up and cause strife in your relationship. Not talking about the issue(s) won’t make it go away, you need to talk about it sooner rather than later. It’s not only important to talk about the problem, but both parties should work together on a solution or at least a conclusion. If you can’t come to an agreement then maybe it’s time to employ the assistance of a couples counselor or a neutral third party (mediator).
It takes two to communicate and it takes two willing parties to make the relationship work. If all else fails after you’ve tried to communicate with your significant other, it is important to remember that a fail relationship doesn’t make you a failure. We all have things that we could work on. If you genuinely tried to make the relationship work, if you did the hard work and acknowledged your shortcomings and things still do not work out, you should give yourself credit for your efforts instead of focusing on the inevitable outcome. The truth is that no matter what we do, sometimes relationships are just not meant to work out, or the issues have become too great for one person to overcome.
I don’t believe that just because the relationship didn’t work out that you have to be enemies. Dust yourself off and learn from the mistakes you’ve made in the relationship to make you next relationship successful. How you choose to navigate going forward can be your success. Good or bad, there are lessons to be learned from each relationship we have. The lessons revolve around identifying many things more clearly, which will allow you to be more successful in your future relationships. A relationship not working out allows us the opportunity to reevaluate what we do and do not want in a relationship.
For me that’s important because I know I have some shortcomings, however, I strive to be a better individual and a better partner. Love is definitely worth fighting for!
“Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry…”
Ephesians 4:26
